Fictional Reality

Review: Breaking Dawn Part I

2011-12-28T21:31:00.000-08:00

Holy hell buckets, I just realised that I never wrote up my review of Breaking Dawn Part 1.

Chances are that if you're interested in Twilight, you have already seen this movie. And if you've read the book, you already know what happens. So, you know Edward and Bella get hitched- Kristen is supposed to look all happy to walk down the aisle towards him, lose all her nerves but instead looks like she's got the trots. Never mind. As usual, Charlie is the one that makes you feel anything- her poor dad, wondering why they hell she wants to marry this dude who ran off and left her without a word and made her go nuts. And, he has a point.

Anyhoot, we were all hoping for some graphic birthing scenes-she was delightfully gaunt, I must say. But it wasn't gruesome enough for me.

Eager for the next, and final, installment of this little addiction.

4/5 The best so far.

Immortals (2011)

2011-11-21T06:12:00.001-08:00

If you like movies with graphic killing scenes and plenty of action, I would most definitely recommend this.

Theseus (Henry Cavill) plays the hero with the amazing upper body, you'll recognise Poseidon as "that guy from Twilight" (Kellan Lutz) and Lysander as "that bad guy from Vampire Diaries" (Joseph Morgan) who seems to have a penchant for playing the villain. Zeus is pretty hot (Luke Evans) and there are other hot people in it as well: Freida Pinto (the enchanting, virginal, oracle- Phaedra), Stephen Dorff (Dirty Stavros) and more. Mickey Rourke plays a convincing asshole as King Hyperion, sadistic and cruel in so many different ways. Australian actress Isabel Lucas (Athena) had just few enough lines to not look stupid, as she so often does, and I was pleasantly surprised with her in this film.

All you need to know is that Theseus is a mortal dude with a great body and no fear (of course!) who Zeus seems to like. King Hyperion is all about wiping out the weak and becoming "immortal"/famous and Theseus has to fight him. There's lots of killing and blood and sword fighting. There's the hot chick he is destined to get with and a bunch of gods upstairs fighting over what happens downstairs.

4/5 entertaining, loved the blood.

Movie: Jane Eyre (2011)

2011-08-19T06:35:00.000-07:00

Starring the intriguing Mia Wasikowska (The most recent Alice) as the repressed governess Jane Eyre and Michael Fassbender (Seen earlier this year as Magneto in X-Men First Class) as the alluring older gentleman- Mr Rochester.

Mia Wasikowska may be a genius. Just saying. She was so convincing and so ethereal and so... Jane. It was very impressive. (Much better than her foray into Alice in Wonderland. I think this role suits her better)

As for Michael, I think I've developed a bit of a crush on him. I loved him in X Men but... damn, he made a hot Rochester.

Having read the book a mere twenty zillion times, my expectations were high, so high in fact that I was preparing myself to be disappointed. But how wrong I was. This movie did not dwell on sections of the book that were irrelevant, nor did it follow a linear timeline that would have bored those who had read the novel. It held the interest of the audience for the entire movie, the scenery was magical, the characters were amazing, the camera work, the music, the raw emotions. It had it all.

I love period drama, it's the costumes, the romance and the characters who are so uptight that the sexual tension could be cut with a plastic spoon. So mayhaps it's not for you, but if you don't want to spend your ten bucks, I suggest you read the book.

I declare, four stars!

Book in review: Beat the Reaper (Josh Bazell)

2011-08-08T09:19:00.000-07:00

Written by Josh Bazell MD this witty fictional tale of an intern with a mobster history as a successful hitman is genius. From start to finish you'll be engrossed in his style of writing and in love with his brutally honest assessment of the world.

Dr Peter Brown isn't any old intern, he's an ex-killer with a gift for saving lives. His humour is dark and laugh-out-loud-even-though-you're-in-public-funny. He's got a chip on his shoulder, a brain sharper than a scalpel blade and a unique talent for dispatching with his enemies.

The book opens with Dr Brown boredly disabling his would-be mugger, and takes you on a roller coaster adventure that will suck you in and leave you wanting more.

Read it! Read it read it read it. FIVE STARS!

Movie in Review: Hanna 2011

2011-08-08T09:09:00.000-07:00

Starring 17 year old Saoirse Ronan as Hanna, bleached hair and brows and blue contacts make her seem surreal and rather odd looking. She's a sheltered killer, brought up by her father to be the perfect assassin.

There isn't a lot to say about this movie, it is good- there's killing and blood and suspense and more blood. Which is all wonderful.

However, thinly veiled storyline, a lack of depth with the background information and Cate Blanchett's attempt to be evil does marr the tale.

I give it 3.5 Stars

X-Men: First Class (2011)

2011-06-25T06:44:00.000-07:00

This prequel, starring James McAvoy as Prof Xavier, definitely filled in some of the gaps the last four movies have kept secret. And not only that, but it did something that few prequels can claim, it had a relevant, interesting, multidimensional storyline.

Character development seemed to be a key aim of the film, with a significant portion devoted to the young lives and origins of each X Man/Woman. Their lives are even more intertwined than one would suspect from the previous four movies, with the exception, perhaps, of Erik- whom we all know to be Charles' best friend and arch nemesis (One of the most interesting relationships in sci-fi history, in my opinion).

James McAvoy plays Xavier (Professor X) to a T, capturing his brilliant mind, wit and supernatural calm, as well as his ability to bring people together and help them develop their abilities.

Michael Fassbender plays a haunted (And sexy) Erik Lehnsherr (Magneto), and you can't help but root for him as he goes about his killing sprees once you've seen his story.

Mystique/Raven is played by Jennifer Lawrence and her story is one that I haven't had the opportunity to explore via the comics. I don't want to give away the storyline so I'll leave it to you to enjoy.

Score: 4/5

Confounding factors: I'm enormously bias due to my immense love of X-Men and all affiliated products ;)

Movie in review: Sucker Punch

2011-06-18T02:00:00.000-07:00

In short: the story of a teenage girl sent to an asylum for a murder she did not commit, by her evil stepfather, who then attempts to escape. The storyline is overlaid by an imagined storyline (in her head) which she involves other inmates in, thereby following through with an utterly impossible plan revolving around four objects which she requires for liberation.

The good points

Pretty girls in pretty costumes
Interesting graphics

The bad points

Repetitive x4
Stupid nicknames
It wasn't gruesome enough
Average storyline
Predictable ending

I think they could have done a lot more with a teenage girl and a samurai sword. I was very disappointed!

In picture form: (Bask in the glory of my paint skills)

Movie in review: Black Swan

2011-01-29T07:01:00.000-08:00

I have two words to describe this movie: Effing Weird.

The acting is good, the sets are good, the special effects are good, the music is excellent, the dancing is beautiful and the lead actress is the stunning Natalie Portman... But that doesn't stop this movie from being so dark and confusing and disturbing and dirty, in equal measures, that the audience left in the most sombre mood I have ever experienced.

Natalie plays a very convincing, insane, ballerina who gets progressively crazier as the movie swoops on, and on and on. You'll cringe, you'll gasp, you might even get a little turned on- but it's still effing weird.

My interpretation of this movie is as follows:

I suspect that those who enjoy artsy-type movies will find this to be an intriguing piece of visual art... but I just think it was effing weird. And I can't even think of a rating. I wouldn't see it twice, even though I'm madly in love with Natalie Portman.

Rating: WTF

Perhaps you can tell me what you thought of it...

Movie in review: Morning Glory

2011-01-24T07:38:00.000-08:00

I admit that I wasn't expecting much from this movie, despite the three seasoned actors involved, and I certainly wasn't expecting to get as many laughs from it as I did. Having no companion to accompany me to said movie, I seated myself in the middle of the theatre and was soon joined by several ~~over the hill~~ middle-aged couples who shared my love of Harrison Ford (Old-man-crush alert. Don't lie, he did it for you as Han Solo, or better yet, Indiana Jones).

Anyway, my initial thought was 'How can you seriously make an entire movie about a morning show?' and I think the answer to that question is to have an adorable Rachel McAdams playing the lead with huge backing from movie juggernauts like old Harrison and the (surprisingly attractive for an older lady) Diane Keaton. If the two news anchors had been replaced with B grade actors (or worse) this movie would have been complete crap. But, I have to admit that I enjoyed the movie and even teared up at the ending (But don't tell anyone).

Still- I'm going to be hard on it and say 3/5 (which is harsh for me), because it's no masterpiece, but it isn't totally lame like I thought it would be.

Movie in review: Tangled

2011-01-06T04:51:00.000-08:00

Maybe I've been extremely lenient on my previous movie reviews, they all seem to score so highly- but I have to give this one a five out of five. Disney has my heart in a shiny filigree cage, filled with animated daisies, paper lanterns and 3D inquisitive fluffy bunnies.

Tangled is a warm and modern look at the age-old Rapunzel fairytale; with an evil old woman/witch (Mother Gothel- I think the name refers to her gothic style of dress), an adorable chameleon side kick (Pascal), a handsome young thief (Flynn), and Maximus the entertaining horse.

Disney is the master of concocting a movie with just the right amount of laughter with tear jerking moments and the magic of beautiful backdrops. There is nothing more perfect than the Disney view of the world in bright greens and electric blue butterflies, songs for every emotion, and castles with pleasant kings and queens and clean streets with loyal and happy subjects.

In short, I want to live in the kingdom of Disney, and this movie rocked.

Go see it! Spend your dimes.

Movie Review: Love and Other Drugs

2010-12-30T20:56:00.000-08:00

The elegant Anne Hathaway plays Maggie, a free spirited artsy type, who is revealed to have a degenerative disease (early onset Parkinson's) which has caused her to switch from painting to photography due to her tremor. The rather attractive Jake Gyllenhaal plays Jamie, a sexed up salesman turned drug rep (not much of a change) who meets Maggie through one of his schemes to get a doctor to sell his drugs in place of Prozac.

One thing leads to another and they end up having crazy sex in her kitchen and then pretty much everywhere else (This movie is not for people with a sensitivity for nudity and sexytimes onscreen). Anyway, as you'd expect, they end up falling in love with each other.

Unlike the typical cookie-cutter romance movies this one lacks the sickly sweet single thread of storyline which would normally make me gag in horror. Rather, they've managed to bring together two similar characters of the opposite sex (bad girl meets bad boy) without the traditional roles of male and female that society impresses upon us. Add in an incurable degenerative disease and a person who is so in love that they'll give up everything for them (Think, A walk to remember without the Jesus bullshit) and you've got a movie.

4/5 Very watchable and sexy, a good date movie with lots of feelgood romance and bitter sweet angst in just the right doses.

Book in review: Dexter is Delicious

2010-12-06T20:21:00.000-08:00

The fifth book from Jeff Lindsay is better than the last (which was pretty good too), get ready to be thrown to the lions in book five with Dexter juggling family and work and his secret hobby.

Jeff gets into Dexter's soul in this book, if he has one, messes with his emotions and has him kidnapped, beaten and almost eaten. Very very entertaining, definitely not one for the kiddies with the killing and the drug references and adult themes. Lindsay certainly has a gift for spinning a tale of mystery and suspense and feeds your own dark passenger with his gruesome line of thought.

The books at this point do not follow the storyline as seen on the TV series, and you really do have to read them in order. But it's well worth your cashola if you've got a strong stomach and a love of justice in its purest form.

10/10 I can't wait for the next book!

What's on TV: Dexter

2010-12-04T05:35:00.000-08:00

One of my special fictional ~~lusts~~ loves in print and on the small screen is nearing the end of its fifth season, Dexter.

Miami's finest blood spatter expert and serial killer, Dexter Morgan, lights up my screen for twelve bloody good episodes each season, which is too few if you ask me. Anyone who likes seeing people get what they deserve, will appreciate Dexter's methods of dispatching with some of the worst offenders in his 'jurisdiction'.

Dexter is joined by his adoptive sister Debra, his father Harry (who's dead), Sergeant Batista, Vince Masouka, and various 'playmates' (or victims, if you prefer). Dexter is a killer with a code to kill killers, often times you'll wish he'd kill other people on the show too.

The books are worth reading (though book 3 is a bit wacky) and only follow parallel to the TV series in the first book, after that it's a dirty free for all. But it's the TV series that truly has my heart.

With season 4 ending heart wrenchingly with the death of a main character (which saw me crying at my desk at 1am watching the ep) season 5 has the delicious addition of Julia Stiles as Lumen Pierce has fans grinning at his new partner in crime.

10/10 every time >>Dexter has not lost its way in five seasons.

UPDATE: Dexter renewed for sixth season, Of course!

Movie in review: Due Date

2010-12-03T02:25:00.000-08:00

Robert Downey Jr (Ironman) and Zach Galifianakis (from the hangover) star is this must-see comedy about an expectant father trying to get to the birth of his first child on time. A very similar concept to the 1987 hit 'Planes trains and automobiles' with Steve Martin and the late John Candy.

After being put on the no fly list and having his wallet and person effects stolen Peter Highman, an architect with a very short temper, is forced to accept the offer of a ride with the aspiring actor Ethan Tremblay.

From the very beginning to the very end you'll be doubled over laughing, clutching the armrest in anticipation (or horror) and you'll leave grinning and telling all your friends to go see it. Notable moments of hilarity (without spoiling it for you): The car accident, the coffee tin, when Peter punches a kid, the possible black father of his child, the escape from Mexico, and so so many others.

Zach is infuriatingly annoying but loyal and Robert is in a bug-eyed rage half the time.

Worth spending your money on, take a friend with a sense of humour and enjoy!

7.5/10

NaNoWriMo Success!

2010-11-30T03:37:00.000-08:00

One month. One novel. One very happy novelist.

Also, bragging rights.

Movie Review: Life as We Know It.

2010-11-29T02:26:00.000-08:00

Starring Katherine Heigl and the oh so sexy Josh Duhamel (take me now. Oh shut up, I know he's married to Fergie) play in the squishy, baby-loving movie about love and, well, a (surprise) baby.

Heigl plays her usual single, mildly successful (but love lorn) self and Duhamel plays his usual muscular, mildly successful, cad self.

They're the two best friends of a couple who gets married, die in an accident and leave their baby behind. You're introduced to the obviously-going-to-get-it-on-at-some-point pair as they are set up on a blind date by the couple in an attempt to hook them up. The date goes horribly with Josh being a complete ass and Katherine hating on him forever more.

So they end up getting thrown together with this baby who they're the godparents of because the couple appointed them as the guardians. Add in some cutesy baby moments, the inevitable arguments, another man and a job offer and you've got yourself a movie.

What's the verdict? Well, predictable- yes. If you've seen the preview that's pretty much the movie. I thought it was a sweet movie, with some genuinely funny scenes. Josh made the movie for me, I'd watch him mowing the lawn (or doing pretty much anything) as long as his shirt was off.

ps. in case you were wondering- yes he does take his shirt off. <3

Book in Review: Love Letters (Katie Fforde)

2010-11-27T11:10:00.000-08:00

I'm not usually one for romance novels, I prefer the romance to be a side story in an action packed adventure, but I put aside my pride and picked up this book from best selling author Katie Fforde. I have to say that the cover art for her books is quite pleasing to the eye, unfortunately I've been unable to snoop the name of that person.

But to the storyline: Single, white, virgin (Laura Horsley) meets the experienced and sexy, Irish author (Dermot Flynn). Laura struggles to overcome her shyness, grows up a bit by taking on the responsibility of a book festival and takes the fancy of the delicious author who just happens to have writers block.

It's predictable, like most romance novels, the main character is kind of pathetic and the leading man is the typical love interest. Throw in a gay male friend and a rock star female friend and you've got yourself a book.

Okay, so maybe I didn't put my preconceptions aside. But before you roll your eyes and shut down the tab I will say that I read it from start to finish (which I couldn't do with The feast of all saints by my favourite author, Anne Rice) and even though I knew what was going to happen I still wanted to read about it happening. So all in all I actually enjoyed it.

I good fluffy read, I'd recommend it for a relaxing weekend.

Book in Review: Secret Diary of a Call Girl by Anonymous

2010-11-25T21:19:00.000-08:00

I guess I'd built this book up in my mind as immensely dirty and graphic because I'd watched a few episodes of the TV show starring Billie Piper (you may remember her from Doctor Who) and as a result was slightly disappointed by the quantity of sexytime scenes in the book (That's right, I admit it).

The author is a London call girl who has a university degree and tries to hold down some soul destroying jobs but finds that she can make more money, in a way that she prefers, having sex for cashola.

She lets you in on some of the secrets of the industry and you'll be constantly entertained with stories about clients and her blunt approach to sex (which is frankly refreshing) but I found I was wanting a bit more when it ended.

So while I enjoyed the book I would suggest that, if you are left wanting, to look into her other works, including her blog. Brooke Magnanti came out in 2009 as the author of the book and now has several others. You can read her side of the story here. She's a fascinating woman with a healthy (though I believe some would disagree) view of her own sexuality.

Book in review: Dexter By Design (Jeff Lindsay)

2010-11-25T21:02:00.000-08:00

The fourth Dexter book by Jeff Lindsay has restored my faith in his writing abilities. While shorter than some of his previous adventures this one is simply too good to put down. As per usual Dexter is pitted against a single enemy with his own dark passenger, in this book that enemy is Weiss, a man who uses the dead as part of works of art. When Dexter kills his partner things get interesting and Dexter finds himself trying to save his own dark children from the clutches of a madman.

It's filled with a healthy dose of gore, murder, titillating descriptions, kidnapping and suspense. Worth the wait, worth its weight. 5/5

Ring a Ding Ding

2010-11-25T20:51:00.000-08:00

Gold Bow Ring

Silver Wings

Just thought I'd post some pretty pictures of some newly attained jewellery. They're both from Diva, the gold bow was a gift for my bestie and the silver wings were a self gift.

I'm at 25000 words on my nano, five days remaining!

Happy Friday!

NaNoWriMo Struggle

2010-11-23T09:23:00.001-08:00

Just passed the 15000 word mark and only a week left to reach 50 000, that's a lot of words. It looked like it was going to be so much easier than it is. Not to mention that I hate the beginning, I don't know where it's going and it's in serious need of a heavy handed editor right now.

Nanowrimo progress report

2010-11-22T00:25:00.000-08:00

Damn damn damn exams! That's my excuse. Currently I'm up to 7633 words when I should be past 25000 by now. Gah!

Currently it's a story about time travel, parallel universes and life outside of Earth. I'm stuck in a paradoxical time travelling debauchle which I can't think myself out of. But no editing is allowed until December!

Never mind. I shall keep you updated.

Go here if you want to watch my progress bar
http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user%252F678401

Book Review: Madame Bovary

2010-10-23T01:23:00.000-07:00

Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert published in 1857.

Apparently this book caused a 'moral outcry' when published due to its erotically motivated main character, Madame Bovary. However, today it would not be considered erotic at all, not even a little bit.

The gist: Emma Bovary is married to a boring, and not very talented, doctor but she dreams of romance and travel and all things adventurous. She reads a lot of books and comes to hate her silly husband for not living up to her fictional standards. She ends up cheating on her husband, with several men whom she falls in love with, and spends all the money and more. The story does not have a happy ending.

I was impressed with the male writer who managed to see things from a woman's point of view in 1857 and who created a delicious cast of characters, most of which you will hate, who reveal the atmosphere of the time and the small town setting.

Emma is a relatively annoying character who's head is in the clouds and has frequent 'attacks of nerves', frivolous spending and genuinely dislikes her daughter.

Still, I found it easy to read and I was never quite sure what was going to happen next (which I thoroughly appreciate in a book). The writer really gets into his characters heads, their thoughts and plans and agendas. It's a tragedy really, the whole situation, but very well written.

4/5

Pencil Drawings

2010-10-18T06:34:00.000-07:00

She's not quite perfect but she sure looks fierce!

Birthday Party

2010-10-07T05:20:00.000-07:00

Stepping out on Saturday night to celebrate my 21st with the best friends anyone could ever ask for. Here's a preview of the outfit...

Lazy Afternoons

2010-10-07T05:02:00.000-07:00

Things I've been meaning to post...

Lion Drawing in 2B Pencil from a photograph

Dragons Head and Venus from "Birth of Venus" By Botticelli

Close up on the Venus

Procrastination from study in Red Texta.

Review: Underworld the Trilogy

2010-09-19T06:56:00.000-07:00

In the beginning there were Vampyres and Lycans (werewolves) and they all originated from the same family, then someone clad a delicious Kate Beckinsale in very tight leather and made her a Death Dealer.

The Underworld trilogy consists of the original Underworld movie (2003), Underworld Evolution (2006) and the prequel Underworld: Rise of the Lycans (2009). Underworld 4 is set for release in 2011. *squee*

Kate Beckinsale certainly seems to have a penchant for vamps or tight corsets, I'm not sure which, so you can also catch her in Van Helsing starring alongside sexy Hugh Jackman (if only he wouldn't wear that hideous hat). Those of you who have read Dracula will get the Van Helsing references made in the movie.

But back to Underworld: One of my favourite vampire movies because it's set in the 21st century with all the high tech crap that nerds like myself enjoy, plenty of fun weapons and a dark storyline (not so much really). The original Underworld is superior to the prequel (rise of the lycans) in both storyline and filmography. Most notably the third movie is very dark (literally) and hence is difficult to see. I can't help but wonder if the budget was smaller so they were trying to skimp of special effects. It's quite annoying.

Underworld I: Sexy, leather-clad heroine with a chip on her shoulder expertly slays lycans. 4/5

Underworld II: Sexy, leather-clad heroine and tag-along, tasty, hybrid, manbag fight the originals. 3/5

Underworld III: Not as sexy, leather clad heroine in love with somewhat attractive underling lycan, a sad tale which you'll know the ending to from watching the first two movies. Sadly lacking in storyline because it's already been spelt out in the previous movies, they still could have done better. 3/5

Vampire diaries: Episode 1 Season 2

2010-09-14T07:57:00.000-07:00

Oh be still my wildly erratic (or irregularly irregular for you meddies), tachycardic pulse! My beloved Damon Salvatore has returned to the small screen for my weekly fix of lust.

The episode premiered in the (lucky) US on the 9th of September and here in Australia on the 13th on channel GO!

SPOILERS AHEAD: Stop reading now if you haven't watched the ep yet.

Bonnie, still pissed about her grandmothers death post-tomb vampires debacle, lied about disabling the device which renders vamps helpless. Thanks to her Caroline is in the hospital, Tylers dad is dead and Elena's brother wants to die. Nice freaking work. You think she'd take one look at Damon's sexy body and just go with it- but no.
Caroline is still annoying this season, maybe a little less because she is stuck in a hospital bed. But those eyes feigning innocence aren't fooling anyone.
Elena, why the hell don't you dump Stefan? Clearly Damon is the superior choice. I just don't understand it...
Poor poor Damon! Katherine sure is a bitch ain't she. Now his heart is broken and he's breaking other peoples' just to get it out of his system. Which, as it turns out, only serves to make him feel worse.

Rating: 4/5 I couldn't help but squee in excitement for almost the entire forty minutes as I returned to Mystic Falls. Sigh.

I welcome the return of the the Vamp Diaries and eagerly await the next installment.

New book reviews coming soon!

2010-08-23T07:23:00.000-07:00

Just got a couple of new books in the mail from my online shopping binge at http://www.borders.com.au/ all wrapped separately in neat little packages.

So expect the next review to be on- House of God by Samuel Shem. I've heard a lot about this one so I have high expectations.

Also- Lasher by Anne Rice (my favourite author)

And some other dirty novel I don't remember ordering...

Review: Aeon Flux

2010-08-20T03:32:00.000-07:00

Charlize Theron stars as the sexy, leather-clad, heroine/villain/freedom fighter in this sci-fi action extravaganza. Released in 2008 it's worth watching, or re-watching, if you're after an female-led action flick with the inevitable gymnastics that come with being a female assassin and the weird four-handed sidekick.

The plot is pretty easy to follow with the odd twist thrown in for the hell of it, characters are thrown into the movie without much background (which I prefer but some may find slightly impersonal). Very little blood, fancy moves, and some interesting costume designing.

Plot-3.5/5
Characters- 3.5/5
Watchability- 4/5
Action- 3.5/5
Blood- 2/5 not enough
Cool Gadgets- 4.5/5
Overall score- 3/5

Dreaming of November...

2010-08-17T07:09:00.000-07:00

November is a wonderful month, it smells like Christmas, tastes like freedom and crushes our souls with exams. November is also the month to write yourself a novel with NANOWRIMO (national novel writing month) where you start writing on the 1st and aim to finish a 50 000 word novella by midnight on the 30th. The closest I came was 30 000 words in 2008 but unfortunately those ~~bastard~~ completely necessary exams cut into the old writing time. I think I'll give it another shot this year for funsies and hopefully I'll reach the target by spending hours listening to The Fray and staying up til the sun rises.

Book Review: The picture of Dorian Gray

2010-08-07T00:37:00.000-07:00

I love love love this book! It's short but manages to be philosophical and relevant even 120 years later!

Why do I keep a special part of my bookshelf reserved for this splendiferous short novel?

Lord Henry says something outstandingly philosophical every time he opens his mouth, and each time you reread the book you agree with him a little more. You won't agree with everything he says though, you'll understand where he's coming from however.
Love, tragedy, philosophy, art, murder, intrigue. You name it, it's here.

Moral of the story: living a life of selfish debauchery makes you an ugly bastard.... well that's sort of half of the story

The Picture of Dorian Gray is by Oscar Wilde.

Plot: 4/5 Excellent!
Characters: 5/5 I'm especially fond of Lord Henry
Total: 5/5 READ this book! Buy a copy, buy two copies!

Flatten that tum

2010-08-01T06:44:00.000-07:00

For best results start off with a few minutes of jogging on the spot to get your heart rate up, and don't forget to stretch.

1. The plank.
Try and keep those stomach muscles nice and tight and maintain your body in a straight line. Try to hold it for two minutes, then switch to the next exercise.

2. Lateral plank (aka Side plank)

Try to keep that body straight again, make sure your bottom doesn't drop down towards the floor. If it's too hard to start off with, try leaning on the elbow of that arm instead. Make sure you look up towards the hand that isn't supporting you so that you don't strain your neck, and don't wear socks- you need traction. Again hold it for two minutes.

Guilty Pleasures

2010-07-31T10:32:00.000-07:00

Up this week- procrastination! Oh how I have missed the sweet kiss of my old friend. First week back at uni and the world outside of white blood cells seems so much shinier.

Fashion.
Discovery of the decade: Modcloth.com how did I live without your retro inspired dresses before?
Say hello to frills, old fashioned necklines and kooky 'apartment' goods. Also, take a minute to appreciate their witty names for products.

Gaming.
Call of duty 2 for cooperative playing goodness. Loving the sniper action, the gunships, the many weapons. Be still my beating heart! (My hands need to be steady for long distance firing).

Reading.
This week I'm reading Dexter in the Dark which is the third book by Jeff Lindsay about the serial killer with a code to kill killers- Dexter Morgan. I've just started it straight after reading book two (I'd give it a rating of 4/5). I salute you! And also can't help but wonder if you get a lot of hate mail from people saying you condone murder...

Funny.
Failblog.org never fails to amuse. Check out the Wedinator section for more hilarity.

Study in Scarlet

2010-07-28T03:55:00.000-07:00

Feeling a bit creative this afternoon, eventually I will take pictures of my drawings. But here is a colour study in RED.

From http://movingdesignz.blogspot.com/2008/09/red-hot.html

Tales from Public transport

2010-07-27T05:12:00.000-07:00

It was a dreary and cold morning at the station, the black cloud of suits was lined up waiting for the train to creep to a stop. If you scan the crowd you'll see the bleary eyed, squinting office underling, the tight-mini-skirt-wearing office skank, the professional suit guy with the shite shoes (he's really quite low on the food chain didn't you know), the homosexual office man with his perfectly manicured nails and his permanent pout, and of course the I'm-so-much-more-important-than-you-toffee-nosed-needle-snake-even-though-I'm-riding-on-the-poor-train-with-you black suited man.

The blank faces, staring eyes... what's behind those 'city faces'?
HILARITY that's what.

Today I saw a I'm-so-much-more-important-than-you-toffee-nosed-needle-snake-even-though-I'm-riding-on-the-poor-train-with-you black suited man run (yes, RUN) off the train and enter another carriage when a woman came on with a screaming baby. I've never seen a person shoot up so fast from their seat when the train is about to leave. He even braved the rain to swap carriages to escape the child. The expression of sheer terror on his face made me laugh, and the other occupants too.

It's always gold when the people who were stony faced actually crack a smile on public transport, sort of a show of solidarity when something truly amazing happens. And it is bound to happen when they cram 500 people inside of a rectangular box and your shoved in workman Bob's armpit and crushing grandma against an anorexic gothling.

One such time involved an uber bogan girl (complete with exposed midriff in the 21st century, 2 inch regrowth and boganesque inability to pronounce words correctly) on her mobile loudly attempting to placate her deadbeat boyf that she was alright with him sleeping with other women because it was an open relationship and she loves and trusts him enough. She then detailed all his other disgusting transgressions and fail portfolio of jobs to the train. An entire row of us couldn't contain our laughter and she kept on talking and glared at us like we were the insane ones. "Aidan, I love you! You can sleep over at Tina's, I'm okay with that because I know you love me. It's okay if you need some time with other chick's, I totally get it. Of course you can have fifty bucks from my wallet. And take my car. Do you need me to pay your fine? When's the court date?"

More often however are the cringe-worthy times. Like when that guy covered in tattoos who you've been trying not to stereotype boomingly greets a new passenger at the halfway point who hasn't seen him in years which he reveals is because he's just got out of jail and the duffel he's carrying is filled with drug money. They congratulate each other for being out in the general public spreading their delinquency and threaten a man who tries to peer into said bag.

How about the mumblers, the stinkers, the ranters, the mobile phone this-train-is-my-office persons, and we shan't miss the sleepers, the drug snorters or the ball scratchers.

Or that time the down syndrome girl stepped in dog crap on her way to the train proceeded to rub it off her shoe with her hand, wipe her hand on her shirt and pants and the seat, become confused as to why everything was covered in shit and stank, lick her hands, fart, cry. Repeat.

The train is a magical place of wonder and horror and intrigue.

See you on the wheel box.

Train count as it stands

2 Marriage proposals
10 pick-up lines
1 Creepy guy taking a picture of me
500+ hrs riding train
1 guy with no pants on
3 People yelling at me

Experiment of the week: The nose knows noses

2010-07-24T05:51:00.000-07:00

Messing with strangers when they don't realise it is most hilarious, try to contain your laughter as you make people do what you want without them knowing it.

WHERE: Public transport, board meeting, preferably where others are facing you.
WHEN: Whenever
WHO: Strangers and friends
WHY: For kicks

A most amusing trick while being bored to death on the train or in a PBL* is to scratch or rub your nose lightly and watch how many people do the same. It usually takes a maximum of three seconds for the people across from you and beside you to follow suit.

Movie in Review: Eclipse

2010-07-21T05:10:00.000-07:00

Die hard fans of the Twilight series flocked to cinema's when Eclipse first came out about a fortnight ago. There was an excess of black eyeliner, 'Team Edward', 'Team Jacob', and over zealous forty-something mother's who looked like they might wet themselves if the movie wouldn't start soon.

Laugh out loud awkward- that's my description of the Bella/Ed moments onscreen. He's not meant to be in pain when he makes out with her at this point in their relationship, he's gotten over it- but still he looks like he's having his appendix out while awake and unanaesthetised. On the upside, Bella is far better looking in this film, which is weird... I'm not sure what they've done to her face/hair/eyebrows but it's good (see her progression below). Her acting is improving as well.

Obviously if you've read the books you know the storyline and if you're a fan, like I am, you have probably seen it already. Jasper speaks! Hooray, he was a good character in the books and I think they should have used him more in the first two films. Thank goodness they have a new actor for Victoria, she's much better looking in this one, and more convincing.

Edward is creepier and more possesive than ever- removing a piece of her truck so she can't go visit Jacob, lying to her so she'll go to her mum's for the weekend.... Oh and watching her sleep still.

Meanwhile, Jacob is disturbingly hot for his age and the kiss between him and Bella is far more breathtaking than any constipaed BellaWard action.

Plot-wise it was silly that Bella is the only one who figured out Victoria was behind the baby vamp army- That's stupid. I mean, she hangs round with a group of vampies who are mostly ancient! Surely they would have figured it out... Of course that's from the book and the movie is just sitting on that template.

Eclipse is by far the best of the three movies, and I'm looking forward to the horror of two things in the next film. 1. The wedding night... and 2. the birth scene. Oh god I hope there's a lot of blood!

Characters: 3/5
Plot: 3/5
Graphics: 3/5
Sexiness: 3/5
Rating: 3/5 And I bet your grandma would think you were insane for liking it if you took her along.

Movie in review: Toy Story 3 in 3D

2010-07-21T04:34:00.000-07:00

When the third installment of Toy Story came out at the movies I couldn't help but laugh at the articles online about men crying during the film, but now that I've had the pleasure of watching it for myself I completely understand.

From the very beginning you find yourself so emotionally involved in the story and it's easy to get lost in the old familiar characters.

There's something for all ages in this one, you'll probably have to blink back tears, laugh out loud and leave the movies with a smile on your face. Topics like leaving home, abandonment, friendship, love, family and growing up are sure to hit home.

You'd have to be heartless not to love this movie.

Animation: 5/5

Plot: 4/5

Characters: 5/5 The old characters are just as good, if not funnier, and the new characters are entertaining and well developed.

Ending: 4.5/5 I thought it ended sadly, though they tried to pick up the mood at the end it was still tugging at my heartstrings as we left the theatre.

Total Score: 4.5/5

Movie review: Predators

2010-07-14T22:53:00.000-07:00

I love action movies! I love it when people are shooting wildly into the jungle, having their spine and skull torn out by aliens, the blood, the guns, the good vs evil. Predators is more action flick than sci-fi (I mean aside from the aliens and it being on a different planet).

I don't want to spoil the movie for you so I won't give away the details. I was disappointed, there are so many unanswered questions, and things which made no sense. Lots of running round the jungle and shooting, probably not enough blood, very little strategy, and the ending left me feeling unfulfilled.

Graphics: 3/5
Blood and gore: 3/5
Acting: 3.5/5
Plot: 2.5/5 They could have done so much more with the storyline.
Overall mark: 3/5 I recommend renting the DVD and not wasting your money on cinema tickets.

Person of the Week: Claudia Black

2010-07-03T09:26:00.000-07:00

Claudia Black is an Australian actress, surprisingly, who is both hilarious and sexy and without whom the last few seasons of SG-1 would have been doomed to boredom and failed miserably. I first came across her in Farscape and Beastmaster (is my sci-fi nerdom showing?) and fell in love with her on Stargate where she plays Vala Mal Doran, a partially reformed thief/con-artiste who comes onto everyone, lies constantly and bounces around like she's enjoying herself all of the time. Somehow she manages to be lovable, sincere and form meaningful relationships with her new friends.

But whatever, she has her own action figure.... isn't that awesome?